Jewish Funeral Services Offered by Brighton Memorial
Brighton Memorial Chapel’s experienced, compassionate staff is here to provide personalized services and funeral direction to Jewish families. We provide guidance to those who have lost a loved one, or to those assisting with final funeral arrangements. We arrange each funeral to ensure that every service detail and family need is meticulously met.
We are able to accommodate a wide range of funeral choices, and serve all of Rochester’s Orthodox, Conservative and Reform Jewish families. We will help guide and explain to families the Jewish burial customs, and will arrange for a Tahara (ritual washing) by the Chevra Kadisha (Burial Society) or a Shomer (watcher) for families that request it. We will help arrange every aspect of the funeral, from finding a rabbi, filing the appropriate paperwork, retiring a loved ones Social Security number, to delivering chairs and books to the house of mourning. Brighton Memorial Chapel will help you with every detail through the process.
Below are the most common services that we provide. If you have special requests, please do not hesitate to ask. We can be reached 24 hours a day, 365 days a year at 585-427-8520.
Brighton Memorial Chapel can arrange in every detail, for a funeral or memorial service to be conducted.
- At the graveside
- In the chapel of the funeral home
- In the chapel or sanctuary of the synagogue
Depending on a congregation policy, a service may be held in the temple or synagogue. Families that are not affiliated with a synagogue may choose to have a service in the chapel of the funeral home or a graveside service right at the cemetery. Often, it is hard to predict how many people will be in attendance for the funeral. If the deceased is young or leaves a large family, or is active in the business or social activates of the community, it is likely that a large number of people will want the opportunity to pay their respects, by either being present at the funeral service or coming to the house of mourning afterward. With the idea that we are all equal, the services in these three locations all follow the same structure, and include the same prayers.
Brighton Memorial Chapel will always fulfill the preferences of our families, and we guarantee our service will focus on your family's needs.
“A Funeral” by Solomon Borisovich Yudovin (1892-1954), Vitebsk Regional Museum in Belarus.
Graveside services are held exclusively at the graveside. Friends and family meet at the cemetery, usually a half-hour before the appointed service time. Depending on the grave location, people may be asked to gather at the main entrance of the cemetery, instead of wandering the cemetery looking for the grave site. This is usually noted in the death notice that appears in the newspaper.
A service held only at the grave includes all the same elements as those begun at the synagogue or funeral home. The service is shorter at the grave because certain elements are repeated when the service is held in two locations. A graveside service is no less dignified than any other service location.
Families like the convenience of the graveside service. Funeral processions through public streets are eliminated. The time spent at the graveside for the service is not rushed and therefore allows more opportunity for reflection and meditation. Families should always keep in mind the potential for inclement weather. There is an option for a tent and space heater. Seating is often limited to the immediate family. The choice to hold a graveside service alone expresses the value Judaism places on simplicity.
Many families feel that a funeral service at the temple for their family member is very personal and comforting. This is a spiritual home where many joyous and meaningful life cycles events have taken place. Depending on the congregation’s policy, a funeral can be held in the synagogue, for a member or a close relative. For families with no congregational affiliation, a funeral can be held in the funeral home chapel. The benefits of an indoor service are that it takes place in a comfortable dry setting, where a large number of people can gather. Indoors, it is easier to hear what is being said. It may be more desirable for a longer service, in inclement weather, or if seating is needed for older people attending the service. Usually, an indoor funeral service is brief, followed by a short ceremony of interment at the cemetery.
A memorial service is performed without the deceased present. This is done after a private burial ceremony, in cases of cremation, or if the person died or was buried in another location. A memorial service can be held in the synagogue, at the funeral home, at a private residence or in an academic setting.
Cremation is contrary to Jewish law but is accepted within the Reform move ment. Brighton Memorial Chapel will accommodate non traditional families that choose cremation. With this option there are many alternatives available to you. Our hope is to allow you to take a more personal role in designing a unique and individual final tribute to your loved one.
Most families appreciate an opportunity to say good-bye to loved ones and to receive condolences and support from friends. A service is often held before a burial, but many people are unaware that the same opportunities are also available before or after the cremation process. We will help design a final tribute that is unique and personalized for your family and friends. The service can be small or large, private or public, and with any type of officiate whether it be a rabbi or someone chosen by the family.
Families should consider:
- Who will be attending the service or gathering.
- If a rabbi, family member or friend will officiate the service or gathering.
- If the service should take place before the cremation or after the cremation process has been completed.
- Where the service will take place, such as the funeral home, synagogue, graveside, at a private home, academic setting, or another venue.
- If there should be music, flowers, and a display of pictures.
After the cremation process is completed, the cremated remains will be returned to the family in the final container (urn) you select. The final container protects the remains and is designed to be a permanent container or a temporary holder before scattering or burial. A complete selection is available from which to choose.
There are many final placement alternatives. You may also want to keep the cremated remains in your possession until you make a decision on final placement. Some of the final placement alternatives include:
- Family possession
- Full scattering or partial scattering
- Burial at a cemetery
- Placed in a niche in a mausoleum
Scattering or partial scattering is final and irreversible and must be done in a manner consistent with local customs and laws. For this reason, careful consideration is suggested. Brighton Memorial Chapel will not scatter ashes for the family, as we believe this to be intrusive to the process. We suggest that family gather to commemorate the life they have lost and release the cremated remains together.
We all have a need to be remembered. Just as with earth burial, cremation allows you the opportunity to memorialize your loved one. Memorials can be as simple or as elaborate as you wish. We will help make it personalized to your families needs.
When someone passes away out of the state or even out of the country, we recommend calling Brighton Memorial Chapel first. We have found that it is less expensive if you contact one funeral home. We can carry out all the details with our out of state affiliates through the Jewish Funeral Directors of America. This will translate into substantial savings to the family. We can also handle arrangements for burial in Israel.
As a courtesy, Brighton Memorial Chapel will deliver to a house of mourning shiva equipment such as adult folding chairs, mourner’s chairs, electric yahrzeit lights, and traditional and reform prayer books. We offer this equipment, as a courtesy, even if the death occurred out of town, and the family chooses to receive family and friends locally.
Preplanning has become an important part of estate planning, and is a means of sparing you the emotional stress of making decisions during a difficult time. By preplanning funeral arrangements, any doubts of your loved ones wishes are eliminated. It also gives your loved ones peace of mind knowing that they have spared you the additional stress of worrying about funeral expenses.
Brighton Memorial Chapel is able to offer a unique opportunity for those who wish to prepay a funeral. If a family chooses to completely fund a pre-need funeral with our firm, we will GUARANTEE in writing that 100% of the funeral home expenses are covered, regardless of when the funeral actually occurs. Your money will sit safely in a trust, earning interest, and will remain in your name until the money is needed. Brighton Memorial Chapel offers both Irrevocable (Medicaid) and Revocable (Medicare) accounts.